As it turns out Molly Ivins isn't coming to Billings after all. Not sure exactly why, but Scott Crichton of the ACLU is trying to get the word out.



I've been gimped up for a week now with a painful, swollen knee. When it got so bad I lost my love for baseball, I went to the doctor.

It was a typical triumph of modern medicine. First they drained several large vials of blood from me -- a medical technique, I believe, that was popular in the 18th century. Then they stretched me out to take cancer-causing "pictures" of my inner knee, interpreting the results using medical techniques that were popular in the fourth century. They concluded that I had a painful, swollen knee for reasons that might be divined through further seances -- I mean analysis. In the meantime, they said, have some drugs.

I went home with no improvement in pain or attitude. Then the drugs kicked in. Ah, sweet peace. If we could ever break the medical monopoly on really good drugs, we might not need doctors at all.